I hate the idea of non-conformists. Sure, I don't believe in conformity, but anyone who actually tells you they are a non-conformist is either an idiot or a liar. (Note that this is the boolean or, as any use of or should be. We should totally incorporate xor into the English language.)
They're an idiot if they are a "non-conformist" because it's trendy to not conform and they don't understand the stupidity of that reason. They are a liar for the same scenario except they do understand the stupidity of it all.
Me? I'm a non-conformist. So, now, according to what I just said, I'm an idiot or a liar. I won't tell you which, but to make it easier for those who know me, I'm also black.
But seriously folks, I've got to stop using such an old cliche to change the tone of my writing, especially when the tone doesn't need much changing. Anyway, the reason I hate people labeling themselves as non-conformists is because a true non-conformist wouldn't feel the need to label themselves as anything. The whole idea behind non-conformity is not letting others think and decide things for you. The logical follow-through is then to think and decide for yourself. If you do that, then there's no need for labels, since labels are basically to affect others' opinions of you, and there's no need for that if you are your own person.
(Of course, you probably will want at least your loved ones to have a good opinion of you, but if you have to change your natural behaviour for that to happen, you || your loved ones are screwed up in one way or another.)
So, if you followed that hastily thought out argument, most true non-conformists will be fairly invisible to the naked eye, since a true non-conformist will do what they want without seeking approval from others and most of the time that will align with everybody else. For example, most non-conformists will still wear clothes, not because it is the norm, but simply because there are good, logical reasons for wearing clothes. With that in mind, it should be fairly obvious that the "non-conformists" who consciously do everything in their power to be the opposite of the norm are just as much slaves to tradition as the conformist, and probably quite a bit less intelligent.
However, true non-conformists can still stick out. Since everybody is different (no two people are not making love), any one person following their own desires and priorities will inevitably stick out from the crowd at some point. As an insignificant example from my own excuse for a life, I have a few pairs of jeans. As far as I can recall, every one of these is very frayed at the hems. In a couple pairs they are actually ripped up the leg a little. Yet I still wear them, in public. Why? Many people (mainly my much too caring family) ask me about them whenever I wear them. Why don't I get new ones, or at least get the old ones fixed? I can see the reasoning behind this, but for me personally the decision to leave the status quo be is easy. I'm somewhat lazy, and buying or repairing pants would take more effort and money than I believe it's worth. They still work perfectly well as pants, and they are no less comfortable, and I don't really care how they look. Since the opinions of people who see me wearing said pants aren't a factor, the other side of the equation doesn't balance out. Therefore, no new pants.
[edit]Ooh, ooh, I remember what I wanted to finish off with, I do I really do! If you actually bothered to read this and understood and agreed with it, you are a) probably in the (at least) top 50th percentile of intelligence, and b) possibly wondering why I would bother writing about this, as if you already know this, I'm telling you what you already know, and if you don't know this, either you're to stupid to understand anyway, or you just don't care enough to have ever pondered the subject, in which case you probably know this in your bones natural-non-conformist. Any one of those possible readers won't really change their opinions after reading this, so why bother writing it? Because I don't really expect anyone to actually read this and I felt like writing it down anyway. I dislike psykoanalyzing myself, as I realize what a futile effort it is (objectivity and all that). So screw you, you commie fascist bastard![/edit]
So anyway, I'm not sure what brought this about, but I think the message of this post is: wear ripped pants fuck the what!
(If this rant happens to get you fired from your job, I will not be held responsible, and will probably laugh my ass off if I hear about it.)
-Anarchronism
23 December 2007
07 November 2007
Do you ever wonder if you actually care about anybody? I do. How do you know when you love somebody, like your parents or siblings or friends. The only reason I have to suspect that I actually care about them is that I don't like the thought of one of them dying, and that's only because I don't like how that would affect the others.
Maybe that's a good thing. I've always thought that most ways of showing you care for other people is really just people being selfish. Think about it, how many times in fiction have you seen someone's grief over losing one of their "loved ones" being expressed by them saying something like "I don't want to lose you."? I know fiction isn't necessarily like real life, but I don't have very much personal experience with that sort of thing, so this is pretty much all I have to go with.
So which is worse? Not really caring if someone leaves, or caring but expressing that concern in a selfish way? Does the latter really just mean you only care about how they affect you? Whenever I see or read about this I'm struck by the dissonance between what love is supposed to be as opposed to how it's represented. Doesn't caring about someone mean caring about them, as opposed to how they affect your life?
I don't know, and I'm pretty sure I'm rambling again. When it's not being graded I don't stick to a topic very well. In that spirit, lets move on to another topic altogether!
I don't understand why people talk to each other about things. Well, I suppose more accurate is that I don't know if they actually do. I don't mean general, everyday conversations obviously, I mean those "deep" talks about love and friendship and such. I hate those talks, mostly because I don't think I'm very good at them.
If I'm the one talking, it feels like I'm being a whiny bitch, and frankly, I doubt it would do any good anyways. If I'm on the receiving end, I don't know what to say, mainly because I don't really care about what they're talking about.
I know, I'm a bastard, eh? But it's true, even if I do care about the person (although that's still in doubt, as discussed above), I usually don't care about what they're talking about, mainly because I usually feel like I wouldn't be reacting in the same way, I wouldn't need help, so why should they? I don't necessarily think I'm stronger than them, I just think that they don't react to things in the best way. Needless to say, I don't have many of these conversations. Also, I don't have a whole lot of drama in my life, so maybe I'm just an ignorant ass who doesn't know what he's talking about. That's ok, since I don't think anyone's actually reading this, and even if they do, I don't particularly care what they might think.
My dad has told be, several times now, that I should find someone to talk to about my feelings. I suppose, in a way, that is what this is for. I guess it's rather cowardly, going on about this stuff if I don't even know if someone will read it or not, but I don't really want to talk about this in real life to someone. I'm just not that kind of guy.
Although I sort of wish it would happen. Do you ever get these urges to be an asshole, just so someone will call you on it so you can finally vent? I do, although so far I've only tried it once. It didn't really work, either I have far better friends than I deserve, or they're just as cowardly as me. Maybe both, or neither. Although I learned afterwards that I might have gotten the results I wanted if I did something differently. Oh well, it probably only would have resulted in physical pain for me.
It does kind of annoy me that no one really tries to dig deeper into my mind though. I'm an attention whore, I guess. Some people do try, it's just that even when my wish is being fulfilled, I'm still evasive and dismissive, so either they don't try hard enough, or I'm just really good at not talking about my feelings. Does this mean that no one really cares about me? Maybe. I suppose I might deserve it, considering I don't know if I would care if that were true.
Ah well, I guess that's enough of me whining for the faceless lack-of-masses.
-Anarchronism
Maybe that's a good thing. I've always thought that most ways of showing you care for other people is really just people being selfish. Think about it, how many times in fiction have you seen someone's grief over losing one of their "loved ones" being expressed by them saying something like "I don't want to lose you."? I know fiction isn't necessarily like real life, but I don't have very much personal experience with that sort of thing, so this is pretty much all I have to go with.
So which is worse? Not really caring if someone leaves, or caring but expressing that concern in a selfish way? Does the latter really just mean you only care about how they affect you? Whenever I see or read about this I'm struck by the dissonance between what love is supposed to be as opposed to how it's represented. Doesn't caring about someone mean caring about them, as opposed to how they affect your life?
I don't know, and I'm pretty sure I'm rambling again. When it's not being graded I don't stick to a topic very well. In that spirit, lets move on to another topic altogether!
I don't understand why people talk to each other about things. Well, I suppose more accurate is that I don't know if they actually do. I don't mean general, everyday conversations obviously, I mean those "deep" talks about love and friendship and such. I hate those talks, mostly because I don't think I'm very good at them.
If I'm the one talking, it feels like I'm being a whiny bitch, and frankly, I doubt it would do any good anyways. If I'm on the receiving end, I don't know what to say, mainly because I don't really care about what they're talking about.
I know, I'm a bastard, eh? But it's true, even if I do care about the person (although that's still in doubt, as discussed above), I usually don't care about what they're talking about, mainly because I usually feel like I wouldn't be reacting in the same way, I wouldn't need help, so why should they? I don't necessarily think I'm stronger than them, I just think that they don't react to things in the best way. Needless to say, I don't have many of these conversations. Also, I don't have a whole lot of drama in my life, so maybe I'm just an ignorant ass who doesn't know what he's talking about. That's ok, since I don't think anyone's actually reading this, and even if they do, I don't particularly care what they might think.
My dad has told be, several times now, that I should find someone to talk to about my feelings. I suppose, in a way, that is what this is for. I guess it's rather cowardly, going on about this stuff if I don't even know if someone will read it or not, but I don't really want to talk about this in real life to someone. I'm just not that kind of guy.
Although I sort of wish it would happen. Do you ever get these urges to be an asshole, just so someone will call you on it so you can finally vent? I do, although so far I've only tried it once. It didn't really work, either I have far better friends than I deserve, or they're just as cowardly as me. Maybe both, or neither. Although I learned afterwards that I might have gotten the results I wanted if I did something differently. Oh well, it probably only would have resulted in physical pain for me.
It does kind of annoy me that no one really tries to dig deeper into my mind though. I'm an attention whore, I guess. Some people do try, it's just that even when my wish is being fulfilled, I'm still evasive and dismissive, so either they don't try hard enough, or I'm just really good at not talking about my feelings. Does this mean that no one really cares about me? Maybe. I suppose I might deserve it, considering I don't know if I would care if that were true.
Ah well, I guess that's enough of me whining for the faceless lack-of-masses.
-Anarchronism
16 October 2007
A Web of LIES
How sad is it when someone's prime medium for vicarious living is webcomics? I currently read over 70 webcomics, and while some of those update rarely, and some even haven't updated since I first found them, the majority get new strips multiple times per week.
I started reading webcomics a few years ago, the first one was Penny Arcade. Big surprise. For those in the host of voices in my head that don't know what Penny Arcade is, see my profile blurb. After that, every now and then (maybe once every couple of months) I find a new comic that I like and read the whole archive, as well as add it to the list of comics I check daily. This usually triggers a sort of comic spree where I do some searching for other new comics and read those archives. I'm currently near the end of such a spree (at least I think it's near the end, it can be difficult to tell).
When I first read webcomics, I usually tried to go for the Penny Arcade style comic, about gaming and without much of an overall plot. Unfortunately, Penny Arcade is, in my opinion, the best by far of all those types of comics. The next best one I've found is Ctrl-Alt-Del, which focuses more on storyline, less on gaming jokes, although there are still a lot of those.
On a side note, Penny Arcade is still great, but over the years it's become more of a game review site and gaming news centre webcomic. As I am not that big a gamer, this disappoints me, and lets a lot of undoubtedly great punchlines fly over my head.
As a direct result of reading Penny Arcade, I began reading User Friendly. This came about from some spat between the two, and as it was mentioned on the PA website, I found UF and started reading it. While UF is still somewhat nerd-oriented, it was the first really in-depth plotline comic I read. Those types of comics are quite possibly my favorite comics to read the archives of, if not to read daily. The reason for this is quite simple: reading the archives is like reading a book, but reading the daily updates as they come is akin to reading one line of a book, and then having to wait for a day, even two or three, to read the next line. It just can't hold your interest as much.
Penny Arcade was the original webcomic, to the best of my knowledge, and so a lot of newer comics were inspired by it. That is why I consider Gaming webcomics a type of their own, because there's enough of them to be a "type". There are three other "types" of comics that I read. One I've mentioned, the plot driven comics. These I like the best, in general. Joke-a-day comics are great, but if the joke isn't particularly funny, that's an update wasted for me. Plot driven comics may not have jokes as often, although many of the good ones fit them in often enough, but almost every update is worth reading, because it advances the plot, lets you know more of the story. (One of the reasons I hate when plot comics waste updates on random sketches or something.) Of course, plot comics are better if they are updated often, while joke a day comics can be updated less often and still be good.
The third type of comic is the joke a day, no plotline whatsoever comic. Of the ones I read, this type is split into two subtypes: the one where the joke is usually very nerdy or(->boolean OR) obscure. I like those because I a a nerd, and I enjoy good nerd-jokes that many "normal" wouldn't get (which just makes it more enjoyable). The other sub-type is when the comic relies on non-sequiturs/puns/offensiveness to make the joke. I find shock-value jokes to be very humorous, although this type of comic is the only one in which I am not likely to read the entire archive of older comics once I discover it.
The fourth type of comic is the comic that never updates. I hate these comics, and yet I still retain them in my list of daily checked comics. I guess it's some vain hope of seeing the author start them up again. And just so you know, I mean they never update. I have at least 5 webcomics that haven't had a new strip since I found them and read their archives. One of them, the archives contain less than 10 strips. At least now I avoid new starting comics that I know haven't been updated in months/years.
So anyway, that was a pointless post. To reward anyone who actually read through it, or anyone who scrolled down to see if there was anything interesting at the end, here's a list of my top webcomics, organized by "type". Also, in order of best to worst (IMO of course) from top to bottom. (cross-type is not ranked).
Google them to find the websites. If you can't find it by just Googling the name, try Googling the name and "comic" or "webcomic".
Gaming/Joke A Day
Penny Arcade
Ctrl-Alt-Del
Sore Thumbs
God Mode
VG Cats
Plot-Driven
User Friendly
Something Positive
MegaTokyo
Dominic Deegan: Oracle for Hire
Least I Could Do
Friendly Hostility
Questionable Content
PvP
Order of the Stick
College Roomies From Hell
Nukees
Girl Genius Online Comics
Buck Godot Online Comics
Misfile
El Goonish Shive
Joke A Day
Subtype 1: Nerdy
xkcd
Decorum
Comedity 2.0
PHD Comics
Geebas on Parade
Suptype 2: Weird Humour
Sinfest
Cyanide and Happiness
White Ninja
Never Updates
I don't recommend any of these comics.
Anarchronism
I started reading webcomics a few years ago, the first one was Penny Arcade. Big surprise. For those in the host of voices in my head that don't know what Penny Arcade is, see my profile blurb. After that, every now and then (maybe once every couple of months) I find a new comic that I like and read the whole archive, as well as add it to the list of comics I check daily. This usually triggers a sort of comic spree where I do some searching for other new comics and read those archives. I'm currently near the end of such a spree (at least I think it's near the end, it can be difficult to tell).
When I first read webcomics, I usually tried to go for the Penny Arcade style comic, about gaming and without much of an overall plot. Unfortunately, Penny Arcade is, in my opinion, the best by far of all those types of comics. The next best one I've found is Ctrl-Alt-Del, which focuses more on storyline, less on gaming jokes, although there are still a lot of those.
On a side note, Penny Arcade is still great, but over the years it's become more of a game review site and gaming news centre webcomic. As I am not that big a gamer, this disappoints me, and lets a lot of undoubtedly great punchlines fly over my head.
As a direct result of reading Penny Arcade, I began reading User Friendly. This came about from some spat between the two, and as it was mentioned on the PA website, I found UF and started reading it. While UF is still somewhat nerd-oriented, it was the first really in-depth plotline comic I read. Those types of comics are quite possibly my favorite comics to read the archives of, if not to read daily. The reason for this is quite simple: reading the archives is like reading a book, but reading the daily updates as they come is akin to reading one line of a book, and then having to wait for a day, even two or three, to read the next line. It just can't hold your interest as much.
Penny Arcade was the original webcomic, to the best of my knowledge, and so a lot of newer comics were inspired by it. That is why I consider Gaming webcomics a type of their own, because there's enough of them to be a "type". There are three other "types" of comics that I read. One I've mentioned, the plot driven comics. These I like the best, in general. Joke-a-day comics are great, but if the joke isn't particularly funny, that's an update wasted for me. Plot driven comics may not have jokes as often, although many of the good ones fit them in often enough, but almost every update is worth reading, because it advances the plot, lets you know more of the story. (One of the reasons I hate when plot comics waste updates on random sketches or something.) Of course, plot comics are better if they are updated often, while joke a day comics can be updated less often and still be good.
The third type of comic is the joke a day, no plotline whatsoever comic. Of the ones I read, this type is split into two subtypes: the one where the joke is usually very nerdy or(->boolean OR) obscure. I like those because I a a nerd, and I enjoy good nerd-jokes that many "normal" wouldn't get (which just makes it more enjoyable). The other sub-type is when the comic relies on non-sequiturs/puns/offensiveness to make the joke. I find shock-value jokes to be very humorous, although this type of comic is the only one in which I am not likely to read the entire archive of older comics once I discover it.
The fourth type of comic is the comic that never updates. I hate these comics, and yet I still retain them in my list of daily checked comics. I guess it's some vain hope of seeing the author start them up again. And just so you know, I mean they never update. I have at least 5 webcomics that haven't had a new strip since I found them and read their archives. One of them, the archives contain less than 10 strips. At least now I avoid new starting comics that I know haven't been updated in months/years.
So anyway, that was a pointless post. To reward anyone who actually read through it, or anyone who scrolled down to see if there was anything interesting at the end, here's a list of my top webcomics, organized by "type". Also, in order of best to worst (IMO of course) from top to bottom. (cross-type is not ranked).
Google them to find the websites. If you can't find it by just Googling the name, try Googling the name and "comic" or "webcomic".
Gaming/Joke A Day
Penny Arcade
Ctrl-Alt-Del
Sore Thumbs
God Mode
VG Cats
Plot-Driven
User Friendly
Something Positive
MegaTokyo
Dominic Deegan: Oracle for Hire
Least I Could Do
Friendly Hostility
Questionable Content
PvP
Order of the Stick
College Roomies From Hell
Nukees
Girl Genius Online Comics
Buck Godot Online Comics
Misfile
El Goonish Shive
Joke A Day
Subtype 1: Nerdy
xkcd
Decorum
Comedity 2.0
PHD Comics
Geebas on Parade
Suptype 2: Weird Humour
Sinfest
Cyanide and Happiness
White Ninja
Never Updates
I don't recommend any of these comics.
Anarchronism
13 October 2007
potatoes
Don't be an anarchist. No, really. You shouldn't ever decide to break whatever rules you want to do whatever you want. Don't get me wrong, I'm having a great time. But I don't want you to do the same thing.
You can probably figure out why. Although I usually don't act very anarchy-ish, if I do break a rule of society here or there, it's safer for me if no-one else is an anarchist. That way if I annoy someone, they're more likely to ignore it. So please, don't ever let it become a world without rules, and I can go on breaking whichever ones I feel like.
Not that I actually break all that many, come to think of it. Occasionally I'll cut in line or something, but for the most part I'll appear to adhere to the rules as much as anyone else. The difference is, I don't follow rules because they're rules. I follow them either because they make sense to me, so I would do it whether there's a rule or not, or because someone with power over me is enforcing the rule. Of course, I suppose you could argue that everyone does that, so I'm not really an anarchist after all. Personally, I don't know who is in the majority, those who follow rules because they are rules, or those who follow rules for the reasons outlined above.
At the very least I think the idea that anarchists break every rule possible just because they are rules is stupid. I consider myself an anarchist because if I think a rule is pointless and if I can get away with breaking it, I will. That doesn't mean I have to run every red light I come to, just because it's against the law.
Ohh, oh, I've got it! Another way to repeat essentially what I just said. Isn't that exciting? Anyway, I consider an anarchist not to be someone who breaks rules, but simply someone who makes their own rules. If those rules happen to coincide with society's at large, fine. But if they don't, then an anarchist will follow their own rule, breaking whichever of societies that means. So when I cut in line, I'm following my rule which goes "I hate waiting in lines, so do whatever it takes to minimize the time spent waiting in a line".
And now for my customarily abrupt.
Anarchronism
You can probably figure out why. Although I usually don't act very anarchy-ish, if I do break a rule of society here or there, it's safer for me if no-one else is an anarchist. That way if I annoy someone, they're more likely to ignore it. So please, don't ever let it become a world without rules, and I can go on breaking whichever ones I feel like.
Not that I actually break all that many, come to think of it. Occasionally I'll cut in line or something, but for the most part I'll appear to adhere to the rules as much as anyone else. The difference is, I don't follow rules because they're rules. I follow them either because they make sense to me, so I would do it whether there's a rule or not, or because someone with power over me is enforcing the rule. Of course, I suppose you could argue that everyone does that, so I'm not really an anarchist after all. Personally, I don't know who is in the majority, those who follow rules because they are rules, or those who follow rules for the reasons outlined above.
At the very least I think the idea that anarchists break every rule possible just because they are rules is stupid. I consider myself an anarchist because if I think a rule is pointless and if I can get away with breaking it, I will. That doesn't mean I have to run every red light I come to, just because it's against the law.
Ohh, oh, I've got it! Another way to repeat essentially what I just said. Isn't that exciting? Anyway, I consider an anarchist not to be someone who breaks rules, but simply someone who makes their own rules. If those rules happen to coincide with society's at large, fine. But if they don't, then an anarchist will follow their own rule, breaking whichever of societies that means. So when I cut in line, I'm following my rule which goes "I hate waiting in lines, so do whatever it takes to minimize the time spent waiting in a line".
And now for my customarily abrupt.
Anarchronism
11 October 2007
The Daily Rant
Hey all. Guess what my rant is about. Hey, what do you know. You're either right or wrong. Or somewhere in between. Anyway, my rant is about rants. Original, eh? Probably not.
So this is my problem with rants: they're pointless. It's just someone airing their opinion about some (usually inconsequential) topic. It's absolutely pointless. Some people may say "Well, rants are useful because they can show people what's wrong with the world so it can be changed". And you might say "Hey, that's a sweet hypothesis you got there". Wrong. The only people a rant convinces are those who already believed what the rant is saying. If anyone ever points you to some rant in a blog or newspaper or anywhere and says they make some good points, none of their opinions were changed in the slightest by that rant. They just already thought the same way.
Conversely, anyone who reads a rant and doesn't believe what it has to say going in, will definitely not believe it coming out. About the only thing that will change is they will think the author of the rant is an idiot. People don't change their opinions for many things, and a rant written by a semi-anonymous faceless internet person is not one of them.
Another reason rants are useless, as well as annoying, is that they're boring. Once again, about the only people interested enough to finish reading a rant are those who already believe it, and a lot of the time even those don't bother. Face it ranters, no one cares. No one freaking cares what you think of the decorator who used too much orange in you bathroom.
And I know that, this being a rant, I'm something of a hypocrite. But I don't really care, because I doubt anyone will read this anyway, and those that do may find the intentional irony amusing. But, this being a rant, and fairly far into one, I could probably goat random words into my dongle and no one will masturbate.
I also realize that if anyone actually reads this, it will sway their opinions on how useful rants are by about as much as the points matter. I just enjoy pointless exercises in futility. (Believe it or not, that previous sentence isn't necessarily redundant.)
Well, it's about time to be hittin' the old dusty trail...
Anarchronism
So this is my problem with rants: they're pointless. It's just someone airing their opinion about some (usually inconsequential) topic. It's absolutely pointless. Some people may say "Well, rants are useful because they can show people what's wrong with the world so it can be changed". And you might say "Hey, that's a sweet hypothesis you got there". Wrong. The only people a rant convinces are those who already believed what the rant is saying. If anyone ever points you to some rant in a blog or newspaper or anywhere and says they make some good points, none of their opinions were changed in the slightest by that rant. They just already thought the same way.
Conversely, anyone who reads a rant and doesn't believe what it has to say going in, will definitely not believe it coming out. About the only thing that will change is they will think the author of the rant is an idiot. People don't change their opinions for many things, and a rant written by a semi-anonymous faceless internet person is not one of them.
Another reason rants are useless, as well as annoying, is that they're boring. Once again, about the only people interested enough to finish reading a rant are those who already believe it, and a lot of the time even those don't bother. Face it ranters, no one cares. No one freaking cares what you think of the decorator who used too much orange in you bathroom.
And I know that, this being a rant, I'm something of a hypocrite. But I don't really care, because I doubt anyone will read this anyway, and those that do may find the intentional irony amusing. But, this being a rant, and fairly far into one, I could probably goat random words into my dongle and no one will masturbate.
I also realize that if anyone actually reads this, it will sway their opinions on how useful rants are by about as much as the points matter. I just enjoy pointless exercises in futility. (Believe it or not, that previous sentence isn't necessarily redundant.)
Well, it's about time to be hittin' the old dusty trail...
Anarchronism
09 October 2007
Just so you know...
I've started a blog. I have no idea why. I seem to recall a solemn vow, involving a lot of pigs blood and such, that I would never stoop so low. I guess that just goes to show how trustworthy I am. Ah well. Just so whoever cares (read: nobody) knows, this is just me rambling about whatever I want to ramble about. I know it's completely public, and I don't care who or what reads this. However, I like uncertainty in some aspects of life, so I don't want anyone to post comments for this, if they would. I want to never know if anyone but me is reading this blog.
Knowing the internet, somebody who reads this is going to take that as a challenge and post a ton of comments. Or even just one. Let me tell that person, if they collapse the waveform of my blog anonymity, I will stop posting forever.
Well, probably not. We all know how trustworthy I am about things that don't matter. At the very least, I will cease to post for however the hell long I feel like. In all likelihood this situation will never come to pass, and if I stop posting it will most likely be because I'm too damn lazy to keep up a blog.
But anyways, I have this weird fantasy of somehow getting a ton of devoted readers who eagerly await my next post. It would be the logical next step in taking over the world. (Step one, get out of bed).
So yeah, letting you know I've started a blog, and managing to ramble incoherently for several paragraphs while doing so. Am I awesome or what?
Anarchronism
Knowing the internet, somebody who reads this is going to take that as a challenge and post a ton of comments. Or even just one. Let me tell that person, if they collapse the waveform of my blog anonymity, I will stop posting forever.
Well, probably not. We all know how trustworthy I am about things that don't matter. At the very least, I will cease to post for however the hell long I feel like. In all likelihood this situation will never come to pass, and if I stop posting it will most likely be because I'm too damn lazy to keep up a blog.
But anyways, I have this weird fantasy of somehow getting a ton of devoted readers who eagerly await my next post. It would be the logical next step in taking over the world. (Step one, get out of bed).
So yeah, letting you know I've started a blog, and managing to ramble incoherently for several paragraphs while doing so. Am I awesome or what?
Anarchronism
08 October 2007
1st post
You know what the worst part of keeping my mouth shut is? Nobody thanks me for it. My friends go out and buy me a cake for my birthday. Guess what? I don't like cake. Obviously those that ever knew about it forgot, and it's not anyone's fault. It just sucks that I smiled, thanked them for it (and I really was grateful, I didn't really expect them to do anything, it was cool that they care that much about me) and even forced most of a slice down. All the while carefully avoiding letting them know that pie is, well, 3.14...^(lim x->0+ (1/x)) times better than cake. Luckily I managed to avoid being given the leftovers. The problem is, nobody was able to appreciate the silence I kept so that they wouldn't feel bad about getting me a cake that I don't like.
Yeah, I know, I'm not supposed to do these things for others' approval. And I don't, not really. If I didn't actually care about not hurting their feelings, I would have told them I don't like cake. But it's stupid to say that knowing I did the right thing should be enough. The point is, most of the good deeds we do are defined by a distinct lack of bad deeds. But those good deeds never go rewarded properly, because to inform the recipient of them will effectively negate the ...effect. Also, I hate it when my vocabulary fails me.
Sometimes I wish I'd never made friends. Or at least only the "sort of" friends I used to have, people I really just hung around with because the alternatives were boring. But now staying at home, doing hermit-like things, isn't enough. I've become a people-junkie. I need some sort of interaction every now and then. But when I do, I feel fake. I don't have enough practice, and I can't tell if my friends actually think I'm funny, smart, or whatever I'm being at the moment, or if they merely tolerate my idiosyncrasies. Or idiocracies, it doesn't really matter which. I can't tell which is better, being the centre of attention, or quietly observing from the sidelines, so I alternate between the two. With one, I feel like a jackass, with the other, I'm too much of a loner, and my need for a fix isn't satisfied.
hunh. This pouring out my thoughts and feelings to potentially everyone on Earth wasn't as soothing as I'd been led to believe. I guess I'll have to go off myself after all.
Anarchronism
Yeah, I know, I'm not supposed to do these things for others' approval. And I don't, not really. If I didn't actually care about not hurting their feelings, I would have told them I don't like cake. But it's stupid to say that knowing I did the right thing should be enough. The point is, most of the good deeds we do are defined by a distinct lack of bad deeds. But those good deeds never go rewarded properly, because to inform the recipient of them will effectively negate the ...effect. Also, I hate it when my vocabulary fails me.
Sometimes I wish I'd never made friends. Or at least only the "sort of" friends I used to have, people I really just hung around with because the alternatives were boring. But now staying at home, doing hermit-like things, isn't enough. I've become a people-junkie. I need some sort of interaction every now and then. But when I do, I feel fake. I don't have enough practice, and I can't tell if my friends actually think I'm funny, smart, or whatever I'm being at the moment, or if they merely tolerate my idiosyncrasies. Or idiocracies, it doesn't really matter which. I can't tell which is better, being the centre of attention, or quietly observing from the sidelines, so I alternate between the two. With one, I feel like a jackass, with the other, I'm too much of a loner, and my need for a fix isn't satisfied.
hunh. This pouring out my thoughts and feelings to potentially everyone on Earth wasn't as soothing as I'd been led to believe. I guess I'll have to go off myself after all.
Anarchronism
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